My life has been a mix of experiences when it comes to touch. At a young age, I remember being a very cuddly kid and enjoyed hugging others. I’ve always been quick to hug and often touch people when I talk. I’m grateful that my experiences haven’t stopped me from believing in the power and the ability to heal through touch.
It hasn’t always been easy, as I’ve experienced inappropriate touch at a young age. I was only four years old when I was sexually abused. It lasted about a year and created a set of beliefs within me around what is safe and who is safe. I’ve felt guarded around men and have questioned my own desires around touch. At 17, a much older man at a friend’s BBQ sexually assaulted me. It was shocking to my system and made me feel dirty and disgusting. The experience made me question my beauty, my passion for life, my playful nature and so much more as I was just stepping into my sexuality as a young woman.
So the concept of touch has always been positive and in my core heart’s wisdom, I knew that it was and is important. My human life experiences have made me question how humans choose to interact. It’s made me ask hard questions about desire and consent. It’s made me break through my walls and fear to continue to be a believer in love, kindness, compassion and goodness.
I share all of this, as it is part of my physical journey. As a human in a body with all the blessings of the body, it’s time we all learn to take responsibility for our needs to be touched and our desire to connect with others – platonic and sexually. I’ve chosen ancient practices to help me work with and through my own issues and to develop a healthy relationship with the body and own my desires and develop my communication skills to express those desires and gain consent with another.
For years, I’ve been a solo practitioner of Tantra. And a few years, I actively participated in workshops with ‘strangers’ who quickly became community. I’ve had private sessions and participated in several online classes. It’s been a beautiful journey of owning my body and experiencing pleasure. I’m learning techniques and practices to deepen my physical connection with my body and open my heart to experience the beauty of energy.
And I’m currently in the process of honoring my body’s need to move. 2019 has been a powerful three months. I’ve started my physical body transformation. I’m moving my body more by going to the gym, going to Pilates, and opening my body up to and with others. I’m no longer going to hide that I have a body. I do realize that you all get I have one but it’s been too easy for me to ignore it and not take care of it which is why I feel like I want to hide it. No More!
So I ask you this:
Do you hug? If not, why not? If yes, do you do it intentionally?
Do you feel like you receive enough human touch?
How could you increase your connection with other humans?
I want to encourage you to really think about and feel into your relationship with touch. If a 20 second huge can increase your natural endorphins, imagine a life where you get several hugs a day… your nervous system would calm down, you’d feel happier, you’d be less stressed and more relaxed, you might even let go of some fear! Just think about the possibilities.